Kingswood Oxford Alumni 85 students at 112th Commencement – We-Ha

Kingswood Oxford’s commencement ceremony was held May 24 on the West Hartford campus.

Posted by Jackie Pisani, Kingswood Oxford School

There’s something magical about Oxford’s Kingswood campus the morning after graduation, when seniors stream in dressed in their graduation attire, collecting bouquets, pinning roses on labels, taking photos and holding tight to their friends.

The morning of May 24, as dappled light streamed through the trees on Senior Green, was as special as the 111 commencements for the school’s 85 graduates that preceded it. Tianyu Zheng was awarded the Duxa Award, the student who achieved the highest grade point average at the earlier awards ceremony, and 17 students received Cum Laude honors. Nineteen students were accepted to play sports at the collegiate level.

Ava Cashman ’24 introduced high school English teacher David Hild as the keynote speaker. This was Hild’s last year at KO as she retires from teaching and coaching. His speech was a bittersweet moment for both him and the many students he influenced during his 31 years at the school. He admitted to the crowd: “I loved being a child and fought hard not to grow up; I still haven’t come to terms with the fact that I’m retiring.”

Hild said he first came to KO as a student in 1975, loving his experience in “a community (that) created fierce loyalty and belonging,” only to return in 1993 at the behest of principal Lee Levinson to lead the football program . During his first 10 years as head football coach and dean of students, Hild began to take on the role of discipline specialist, eventually learning that “the best way to reach students is through positivity and kindness.” Kind words are jewels that live in the heart and soul. To this end, I tried to devote as much time as possible to my students, because what better way to show them kindness.”

In his care for seniors, Hild emphasized the importance of joining a “team” – built on communication, kindness and empathy. He said research has shown that the healthiest lives are lived by people who are rooted in community, no matter how we define it. Hild shared a funny anecdote from his experience with Team Tobati in Paraguay, during KO’s annual work trip, where he and his group were asked to dance to “Despacito” in front of 2,000 people. Despite his and his team’s dancing limitations, they went all out, encouraging each other when they got the routine wrong. Lesson learned? “Being in a band forces you to give,” he said. “You don’t focus on ‘I’, but on ‘We.’ You find things within yourself that you didn’t know existed; you improve yourself and the people you are with by being a member of a community.

Hild said that when he was a coach, his players wore a plain gray T-shirt with the letter S, M, L or XL in black on the chest. “Gray T” was the great equalizer, making you one of the guys rather than the standout. Putting on a simple T-shirt strengthened the “me” group. “So no matter what team you are on, treat your role more as helping others than taking care of yourself,” he said. In this “giving competition,” Hild said, the team can reach new heights.

Ever the coach, Hild ended his speech to the seniors like a pep talk to his players. “Therefore, strive tirelessly to help and support your team. Even the conscious act of trying to determine not “what you want” but “what the team needs” is better. And as I have learned time and time again throughout my teaching career, what is best for the community is what is best for the individual.”

Headmaster Tom Dillow, in charge of the senior class, stressed to students not to take the next four years of study for granted. He shared the incredible privilege of being able to attend college, as many young people around the world must struggle with government restrictions or economic hardship to obtain an education.

During his second class appearance, Dillow told students not to view a college education as a means to an end – a way to make money – but rather as “an investment in becoming a fully human being.” To achieve this goal, Dillow recommended that students surround themselves with people with different perspectives and ways of thinking. “Challenge your assumptions and keep asking questions,” he said. “The world needs more critical thinkers and more empathy. Learn to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and see the world from their perspective.”

In his final address to the class, Dillow told students to choose jobs that make them happy and give them purpose. “Remember that true happiness, or living a successful life, comes from developing meaningful relationships, finding purpose, and serving others.”

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